Silence Of The Smits

Silence Of The Smits

This blog has been silent for a while.
A lot happened in these past few months and we needed time to grow. Grow as persons, grow as emotional beings, grow as full-time travelers.

Much needed rest.

We needed rest in order to make this growth happen.
It’s not a big secret that we started to travel full-time out of necessity. Our government changed homeschooling laws in our country, making it impossible for us to stay there any longer. It’s a long story of highly gifted and highsensitive children with severe performance anxiety that are 4 years advanced over their peers of the same age, but can’t perform well on the mandatory tests and exams. A story too long to write down again. But it does gave us no other option than leave the country quickly.
We didn’t have any savings and were financially in a bad place even before we sold everything to go travel. But there was no other choice.
So we took a huge leap of faith and jumped in the darkness, not knowing what was going to happen.
And we failed big time. We visited the most beautiful placed, but we were not able to gain an income on our first try of our travels. Our endeavors could only fail, as we started from 0 in knowledge about full-time traveling with no savings.
So, instead of sharing our travels and experiences online, we decided to focus on our goals and make sure to get there. A much needed resting period came our way, in which we went back to the cabin in the forest.

Forced to grow up.

During that time, we broke down even more. Nothing went the way we wanted things to go. Close family bullied us by sending the cops on our tails, even though we didn’t do anything illegal from the start of our adventure. They were just jealous, because we choose freedom while they feel like they are stuck in their lives. It brought even more stress our way and the people who had our backs and were there for us were caught in the crossfire. Depression came along for some of us, almost ripping our family apart. It was a huge strain on our marriage, making us wanting to give up sometimes. This has been the darkest times of our lives together so far. We were forced to grow up by people who didn’t want to see us happy.
Every endeavor in trying to create an income of our own failed.

Surprise!

On top of it all, we were blessed with the biggest surprise ever. Back in Lagos, Portugal, another soul decided that it was the right time to join our family. Even though we never planned it, we got pregnant with baby #5. Huge surprise, huge emotional struggle. Absolutely not the right time too. It felt like life really wanted to bring us down.
(The pregnancy itself deserves its own blog post. We will write this one soon. It’s time to share it all.)
Being pregnant brought a lot of emotions. I didn’t want to be pregnant, ever looked into abortion, but luckily never went beyond looking up information about it. I would never be able to abort a baby, no matter how bad the timing is.
But I never enjoyed the pregnancy. It was hard both physically and emotionally. I never cried that much as during this time in my life. The stress that went on only made it worse of course. We had no income, the police and government were questioning us without us doing anything wrong, and we had a tough pregnancy physically… a prenatal depression was inevitable and took most of my pregnancy hostage.

Light at the end of the tunnel…

But this baby wouldn’t be this baby if everything didn’t just work out. The biggest lesson that this baby brought us was to trust. Trust that the Universe would have our backs and bring us everything we needed at the exact right time.
And so it happened. In the final weeks of the pregnancy, rest came over us. Finances came in from the most unexpected directions. We felt stronger over time and got over all the anxiety that followed us around. And to top it off, our baby was born in the most amazing and healing birth ever. I couldn’t be more grateful for this birth experience. It was able to heal previous births as well.
A beautiful baby boy was born into our family, making all of us whole again.

And now…

And now we stand. We stand stronger than ever before. We have tons of ideas to fix the financial side of our lives and are following up on those. (More about that later.) We are working our ass off, but are enjoying every moment of it.
And that baby of ours turns out to be the best thing that could happen to us. He healed us and made us stronger. He completed us in ways we couldn’t imagine. He’s another light for which we fight.

We are planning leaving this country again in the near future.
And this time we will thrive and do better. This time it will all work out. We can do this!

Thank you, Universe, for all the lessons learned. Thank you for looking out for us and guiding us in the right direction.
We had a tough year, but it made us better.

To be continued…

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